i'm super tired right now, and my whole body felt like breaking apart from a session of agressive workout in True yoga earlier on. Damn exhausted and weak, but i still wanna blog.. so forgive my spelling errors or phrasing errors or wadver errors la.

it's a tough day today, at work where i hav to tolerate ppl giving me attitude, with the kind of tone tt tells me "you are incompetent", in which i felt damn hurt and disappointed. it's not tt i have such limited knowledge or wad, and i do know the problems that lie with me. i did strived, but i do not get the answer i want, nor of the acknowledgement. each time i asked a question, i felt the bruise on my ego cutting deeper. sometimes its not like i dun understand, i just need assurance or confirmation to carry on. mayb....... i didnt strive hard enough?? i dunno, but i'm trying.

there's flaws in everyone; nobody is perfect. i tried to understand this, so that i could empathize them. but by doing so doesnt mean i dun get angry, and by doing so doesnt mean i will jus agree to whatever u do. mayb the most is, to note the person of his/her one flaw out of so many, such tt he/she will minimize the wrongdoing. yet some ppl do it the other way - they jus left u as wad u are, such tt u didnt know wad wrong u did and chances of repeating it, thus, will be ve high. true enough, they might jus tut u're not worth to be reminded yet, or they wanted to respect u, as this is wad u are, wad made of u. which way is correct then? it's up to u to decide..

i have done nothing yet to turn the things around, in fact, i might just done the worse, which totally defeatys the purpose. but then seriously, i dunno wad worse i'd done to create such a situation, and it's the least i expected. either way, it's not like i gave up or wad.. i jus withdrew myself at time being 1st, as there are too many problems around me to fret. i dun wanna think too much, cos it's getting darn tiring.. mayb i shld let nature takes its course???

and speaking of tired.. i wld jus want to lie on the bed and sleep like a loghead now. anything i want to add, it'll be continued...

no hardcore drinks anymore

back from the effect of alcohol hell!!! =(

cant believe i got this drunk! went to bbq with colleagues last night and i didnt ate a lot. neither did i drank a lot after rounds of games there. i mean, there's a few times i drank quite a lot but i didnt got really drunk, not as drunk as last nite! all i rmb was i puked all over, i stepped onto my fren's toe after which it broke and bleed, and they send and practically carry me hm - oh no, brought me to my bed instead, and help me locked my front door. 0_0 (but i was really grateful for their help.. and nt to mention how apologetic i am to cause em so much trouble!!)

laid in my bed tho, i still couldnt fall asleep cos of the throbbin headache and spinning head. this is probably the worse drunk experience i had! and it SUCKS!!!

seriously i couldnt determine my level of drunk-ness. but i promised myself, other than special occasions, i will NOT ever got this drunk in public again!

wordpress.com

ppl.
fyi, i will be moving my blog to wordpress soon. reasons? i got tired of blogspot and wordpress could provide me a more private space for my very own entries. heh.

will update my new blog again. =)

NOT new yr resolutions.

i came to my blog and wow, i missed e festives greetings! in fact, i missed a lot of entries on which i shld have blogged about!! company's dinner and dance.. xmas, and new yr and +++. i'm just too tired and busy!!!

a short summary.. a lot has been going on lately, and big decisions have been made after new yr, mainly based on nobody's influence but mine. these major decisions i came to might have cause a huge impact in my life, and thus i had been bothered by numerous questions i got to ask myself, and not to mention the dilemma and uncertainties while making these decisions, even after i have reached the decisions myself. till now, i'm still unsure tt they are concluded out of rational mind or out of impulsion. was even fearful of how the outcome will be too..

(question mark. question mark. question mark.) =_=

one of the issues comprised in the decisions i made, i understand and could estimate the consequences if should it be unsuccessful. a risky attempt, i should say, not many of my gender are brave and willing enough to choose this course of action. i myself had been struggling for days to make it a smooth one, unfortunately it didnt went the way i want it to be.. i'm such an egoistic person, in fact too egoistic tt to perform this task i had fight the cold war with myself in my head for days, before the devil lose out to the angel tt i could finally settle on it.

(debate debate debate) O_O**

i dun wanna do anything tt will affect the other's life; yet i got so much left unsaid, but couldnt be conveyed. it's ok.

*when we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.
opportunities are what you should fight for, even when you're given none.

i duno wanna think much about it, only to do my best.